Sunday, January 30, 2011

Seven Habits Blog #3

Habit 5: Seek first to Understand, Then to be Understood

I liked this habit because i tend to rush into a situation trying to fix it before i really understand or know what is wrong.  This habit is a great wake up call for me.  I liked very much how the different kinds of listening were defined and explained: ignoring, pretending, selective listening, attentive, and empathetic listening.

Empathetic Listening is listening with the intent to understand.  This should be how an individual listens always instead of choosing another listening style.  With empathetic listening comes the point that a diagnosis must be made before a prescription is given which just reiterates that you cannot jump in with a solution without first knowing and having a full understanding of the current situation.

Once this full understanding is reached then you try to prescribe and give your input.   Finally seeking to be understood as well. 

Seven Habits Blog #2

I really liked the idea of the Emotional Bank Account. This is a metaphor used to describe the bonds in a relationship built upon trust.  Deposits must be made into the account so that a reserve is built up for any incident that may occur.  It is a JOINT bank account that must have contributions made by the parties involved in the relationship. The trust built up in the account is built in both individuals and can be called upon whenever it is needed but keep in mind that when you make a withdrawal you must replenish what you take.  When the trust reserve is high then communication comes easily and is high effective.  But when a bad event happens causing an overdraft there are fees that might have to be paid too.  When overdrafts happen too often then the trust reserve becomes low the flexibility and communication are no longer there.  Basically working relationships require both parties contributing to the account continuously. 

1. understanding the individual
2. attending to the little things
3. keeping commitments
4. clarifying expectations
5. showing personal integrity
6. apologizing sincerely (when you make a withdrawal)

These six deposits are the best ways to keep the emotional bank account full!

Seven Habits Blog #1

We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.


I really liked in the introduction of the book this quote by Aristotle.  In the introduction I like how our character is defined as a composite of our habits(habits that can be learned and unlearned).  Then habit is broken down into three categories: knowledge, skill, and desire.  All three of these components must be present in order to create a functioning habit. 

Habits are constantly changing too in order to produce HAPPINESS an emotion everyone is striving to feel.  So these Seven Habits are supposed to be progressive changes on the Maturity Continuum from dependence to independence to interdependence.  I had never thought of a process towards maturity or that habits can be the vehicle in which you use to accomplish interdependence.

 Another thing i like just inside the introduction is how the habits have been broken down.  The first three are called "Private Victories" in which one masters oneself.  The second three are called "Public Victories" which deals with teamwork, communication, and cooperation.  Habit 7 is a habit of self renewal.  So once you apply all of the new habits you discover losing the old and only keeping the productive you can use a little self renewal to rest and recuperate from an overdose of self improvement.

You get to take away what you want from this book rather than feel like this self-help book is cramming information down your throat expecting you to swallow it whole.